Here’s the good, the bad, the raw of my weight loss journey. I share this in hopes that if you see any similarities in your journey, it helps you to not feel alone. I want you to know that if I can do it, so can you. If I can get through these things… so can you.
Life sucks sometimes and it’s just the reality of a broken world. Our bodies don’t work perfectly. We have sickness, and broken bones, and imperfect fertility.
If we attach God’s blessing to our fertility and our families it would mean I am more favored by God than the woman next to me who can’t have children. And we know God’s love doesn’t work that way.
And the salt in the wound of my tender millennial christian heart was when the “things” meant more to people than people. When the rosary and the praying of it was more important than looking and seeing your neighbor’s need wasn’t a holy card but a smile and a hug.
So yeah, I’m not the perfect Christian. Not always the loving, well-behaved daughter of God. But He is big enough to handle my big, complicated emotions. He is understanding enough to listen to my angry ranting and raving.
It’s okay to stop suffering. There is no need to drag on your suffering when God is inviting you to step into the new person your suffering can enable you to become.
To say God only has good in the future is a lie about who He is. We have a God who is all love and that kind of God won’t let you suffer today without redeeming it in some way. The question is if you will notice it and be grateful for it.
Beauty reminds me that God is good. It reminds me that life isn’t only pain and death and frustrated hope but life is also joy and goodness and the purity of truth.
I forget the blessing because the pain hurts so much. I am at the same time grateful but also angry. Life is never black and white, cut and dry, one or the other.
What do you do when your worst fear is realized? How do you cope when your nightmare follows you into your waking?